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Columbus Would Blush – By Captain Ron
After being transferred to Miami, my wife Carol and I sailed Lastdance, our Crealock 37, to Florida from the Chesapeake. We sailed mostly coastal, ducking inside to the ICW for sightseeing or when bad weather threatened but the marshes of Georgia were too much to deal with in July so we headed out to sea and enjoyed a great overnight coastal sail to Florida . After 22 days of leisurely cruising, we arrived in Ft. Lauderdale and took a mooring at Las Olas, then broke out the blender. Folks from a nearby mooring rowed over so we invited them aboard and after a batch of margaritas we knew the scuttlebutt on bars, anchorages and the upcoming Columbus Day Regatta. We don’t race but although hundreds of boats do race in this event, thousands go only for the wild party.
By Labor Day, most talk around the marina was of the regatta and Carol soon committed us to going with our dock mates. They promptly gave us a list of mandatory items to bring along: a life-sized rubber doll and a large supply of adult beverages!
A month later, we left Marina Bay and sailed to Miami with five other boats including Song, another Crealock 37. Now I have to tell you, there are few production boats more seaworthy or prettier than a cutter-rigged Crealock and here were two of them under full sail, not a quarter of a mile off the beach…it was a beautiful sight!
Arriving off Miami, we sailed our way down the cruise ship channel dwafted but a row of massive cruise ships. We doused sail at the juncture of the channel and the ICW, then motored to Miamarina at Bayside which is a collection of restaurants, bars and shops. Once in our assigned slips, our horde of would-be-pirates marched off to the nearest bar for mojitos and by the third round, we were dancing and toasting life, the sea and our women! More mojitos and some sightseeing, followed by afternoon naps and we were back for a really great dinner at Lombardi’s.
We departed Miamarina at dawn and motored past high-rise condos, then under the Rickenbacker Bridge past Virginia Key and Key Biscayne then into Biscayne Bay. With only the sound of the wind across our sails and the ripple of our wake, we glided through clear water bound for Elliot Key, leaving Miami and inhibitions behind.
To get to Elliot Key you must cross Featherbed Bank which runs across Biscayne Bay from Boca Chita Key to Black Point. Be sure of your navigation and DO NOT run aground here. This is Biscayne National Park with protected coral and sea grass and if you find yourself aground, you can be fined zillions of dollars.
There are two channels here. The main channel marked by flashing green “3” and red “4” and the east channel which runs close to Sands Key but it requires more attention. Once clear of Featherbed, we steered for a forested Island but I soon realized that the forest was really thousands of mast in the anchorage and holy cow, naked people! My first thought was that the party already started so I was as eager to get there as my 1st Mate who was emanating ooo’s and ahhh’s from the foredeck.
As we rafted up, I remember thinking, “why did we anchor so far away from the main action.” Well, there is no way to describe this anchorage during this event other than to say it’s not for the feint of heart because you can almost pass a beer to the boat alongside you. Sleep? Forget it, the music is non-stop and very loud and the anchorage is exposed to the north, south and west with considerable fetch in each quadrant so I shudder to think of the mess it might be in a nasty squall. I quickly came to appreciate the wisdom of anchoring on the periphery of what could become the world’s largest unintentional raft-up. So why would anyone come here? Because it’s a lot of fun, that’s why.
It should be known that the regatta is a serious event and has nothing to do with the party other than it has been an excuse for the party for five decades. It should also be known that the party is an adult, clothing optional event and that in addition to drinking, dancing, singing, swimming and dinghy rides, there is a lot of topless/nude drinking, dancing, singing, swimming and dinghy rides.
With our 6-boat flotilla securely rafted, a huge Jolly Roger was raised and our group of middle-aged sailors morphed into Compotatio Animanantis, aka,Party Animals. Tequila was the drink of choice, both straight and from four 5-gallon margarita coolers. This soon resulted in a dozen or so bikini tops and bras flying from spreader halyards along with several of the aforementioned rubber dolls.
We socialized with friends and nearby boat crews then explored Elliot Key by dinghy. Soon, smells from thousands of grills drifted across the anchorage so we rushed back in time to share our raft’s pot luck dinner followed by a tequila tasting contest.
We wanted to explore Boca Chita Key the next day so we broke away and motored up the east channel, then on to the little harbor at Boca Chita. This is a beautiful little key with bulkhead tie ups only, but the park provides grills and pavilions and you can stay overnight.
We also discovered that this is a favorite spot to celebrate New Years but be sure come as much as a week ahead of time as it fills up with locals early. After lunch we explored the lighthouse and took a romantic walk along the beach.
We were soon underway toward Miami but decided to head out to the ocean via Biscayne Channel which joins Cape Florida Channel about where it enters the ocean several miles north of Fowey Rock. These channels appear to be carved out of coral rising almost to the surface with coral lining both sides of these otherwise deep waterways. This is Stiltsville, a group of vacation/fishing homes on state-leased shallows and sailing through here is like driving down a rural street lined with homes.
Once on the ocean, I steered a course to Fort Lauderdale that arced out into the Gulf Stream, giving us a lift from this fast moving river in the sea. Now Lastdance is not the fastest boat in the world but with the wind around 15 knots and if I stumble around and get her sails properly trimmed, we can log some serious miles. That day, with 2+ of current and a stiff breeze, we sailed from Government Cut to Port Everglades in just over 2 hours, averaging 9.6 knots!
Wild regatta party, great friends, yet another “best ever sail” Can life get any better?
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